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A Medicinal Marijuana User’s Guide to Getting Weed Outside of Canada

Step one: Bring your papers but also bring the paper that really matters, as in bribery cash.

Lemon kush. Photo via Flickr user Mark

Though one can still be arrested for the mere possession of weed in Canada, we don't seem all too concerned about that. We smoke joints in parks and conduct terribly obvious handoffs on street corners. And though our government insists it doesn't recognize weed as a medicine, it also, you know, recognizes weed as a medicine, as people can be exempted from the law if they have a medical license. Obtaining such a license within the confines of our stoney country can be difficult enough. But in other countries, the chase can seem prohibitive. In some cases, a medicinal stoner might just decide to stay home and avoid a sad and fruitless pursuit of sinsemilla and the pain that comes without it.

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Luckily, there are a few professional stoners in Canada who are willing to direct the rest of us away from our general derpiness and onto the path of some dece dank. Mark Klokeid, otherwise known as The Weed Guy, smokes weed for medicinal purposes. In 2003, doctors found a lump in his neck, and he was diagnosed with stage IV cancer. He vaped to get through the chemo, deal with the nausea, and get some sleep. He still has health concerns, and his body is still facing some difficulties following that.

But now, he's an advocate for the use of medicinal weed and runs a BC dispensary called iMedikate. He also founded kush.ca, where you will find video footage in which Klokeid gallavants through various countries in search of reefer.

"Smoking weed takes your mind off of [the pain], gives you something else to focus on," he says. "There's a sense of community; there's a sense of ritual and spiritualism using cannabis."

Klokeid says it's possible to re-up in just about any country. But he always makes sure to do his research ahead of time to see if his federal exemption will help him. Obviously it's dumb to try to do the cross-border smuggle, given weed's cruel scent and the fact that it's likely to land your ass in jail. Klokeid breaks down the rules for weed-hunting abroad.

Step one: Bring your papers but also bring the paper that really matters, bribery cash.

"I recommend bringing some bribery money," Klokeid says. In most countries, if you plan to pursue some pot tourism, it's best to carry a few hundred extra dollars to pay off police. The trick usually works for him, but this is coming from a guy who has done time in a Hong Kong jail. A couple of years ago, he flew in from Amsterdam, was searched, and discovered with a roach in his pocket. Because he's a diabetic, he had to be transported to a medical prison ward before going to court.

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"I was in there with Tanzanian drug dealers, four or five of them, and they were handcuffed to the bed. They were pooping out little black eggs, I don't know if it was heroin or hash or what it was."

His court date went as well as could be hoped: he was fined the equivalent of about $50 and set free. In China, he says, he doesn't think anything too terrible would ever happen. (If you're in western China and happen to visit Kashgar, you can buy hash at the open market.) "I think at worst, they'd take your passport and tell you to get the hell out of the country. You know, they'll blacklist ya." You'd probably also have to pay some money, and maybe spend a few weeks in prison.

That said, government there recognized Klokeid's federal exemption. He had his papers with him, and he says the customs officers actually felt bad for him. Can't emphasize enough: Bring. Your. Papers.

OK, but what if you want to avoid such a fate?

One of the best places for weed shopping, according to Klokeid, is Nepal. It's not legal, but it grows naturally just about everywhere, so it's not hard to get. If you're there long enough, you can literally just go and pick some leaves and cure them yourself. There's also amazing hash. He's had good luck in Cambodia, too, and in Spain, where it's illegal to sell weed, but not to consume it. (That's provided you smoke up in your private home and refrain from doing bong rips out in the street like a fratty dick.) The compassion clubs in Spain recognize Klokeid's exemption and sometimes even hook him up with a discount. Jamaica, too, has good weed that's readily available (obviously).

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In order to figure out how to get weed abroad, Klokeid gets friendly with the locals, finds one he trusts, and pays them a flat rate for a day tour, plus some extra so they'll bring him to the weed. Klokeid sometimes hires a translator, but he usually just uses Google translate to communicate. He goes to the same driver whenever he's in Cambodia. In Nepal, a dude once found him a 20-foot-tall plant.

On that note, we need to discuss how not to look sketch when attempting to purchase marijuana in other countries. It turns out getting a pot leaf tramp stamp might go a long way in that regard. Klokeid has a pot tattoo on his back, so when he wants some, he just shows it to the potential dealers and they "immediately relax" upon sight of it, apparently. Making people feel comfortable is key.

Also, make sure you're comfortable. Don't give anyone money until you see the product. Don't make yourself out to be wealthy, or you're begging to be robbed. If you're nervous, you can always make them smoke some first. Aside from that, he says it's simply a matter of going online and getting tips from stoners who have gone before. At the end of the day, it's stoner trust that'll get you through.

"You know what? Us pot smokers, when we look eye to eye, we tend to know who's on the right and who's not."

When all else fails, the internet will always help you get high. Klokeid was desperate for weed in Sri Lanka, and was about to fly out to a remote island off the coast. He went online and found himself in a thread on the subject. A guy said he should email him, because he had a huge stash of hash oil. He emailed, and was told to meet him at the airport. The dude showed up and saved Klokeid from days of discomfort and sleepless nights.

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"[This island was] one of the hardest places to find weed if you had to. People watching my videos think I smuggled it, but I really scored it at the airport, you know. It's that kind of research you need to do if you're a patient like me."

In terms of countries where you're absolutely fucked: if you need weed, don't go to Singapore, Indonesia, or Korea.

"Indonesia is pretty bad. It's super, super illegal. In Singapore, I didn't even bother." Japan is also a pretty wretched part of the world to try to get stoned.

When I started writing this article, I wanted to explore how Canadians could get away with being medically sanctioned stoners in the US, Klokeid says it's simply a matter of going somewhere a Canadian exemption would translate, like Colorado, California, Washington, or Alaska. He brings his doctor's diagnosis and "seeks out places that are friendly," researching the requirements and legality of medical pot in those states before he goes.

"I wouldn't carry marijuana across the border. Your options are simply to access the services [available] to patients that are American."

I call around to a few compassion clubs in Toronto. Management at two different places say they've never heard clients discuss accessing medical pot in the US. They have a feeling many patients simply avoid going there because they can't be without their medication.

If you're forced to do without, Klokeid recommends using synthetic THC. Without it, he finds he has difficulty sleeping, can only sleep for four or five hours, and ends up feeling restless.

"They're good enough—especially if you take enough of them—but I find they're hit or miss. I don't go too many places where there's no cannabis at all."

On the flip side, if you're visiting BC from another country, it's pretty easy for someone to hook you up. You just have to bring your state papers (or the equivalent), and a membership to a dispensary. If you don't have those things, you can get a diagnosis from a naturopath for about $50, Klokeid says. Some dispensaries in Canada will even serve you if you arrive with a doctor's note in hand.

"All of the dispensaries here are more than eager to help people," he says. "If you book your naturopath appointment before you come up here and see the doctor, you could instantly be getting cannabis."

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