VICE STUFF
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Amy’s Baking Company's Grand Reopening Nearly Bored Me to Death
In some kind of misguided attempt to renew their brand, Amy and Samy of the infamous Amy's Baking Company hired a PR guy and decided to have a relaunch. Since I work right down the street from the restaurant, I decided to drop in. Full story
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Rave and Hardcore YouTube Comments Will Restore Your Faith in Humanity
It's commonly held knowledge that most YouTube comments rank up there with Houellebecq novels and Somme fatality statistics as some of the most depressing things you can read. But, thankfully, there are a few diamonds of decency in that online hate-pit, and they usually arrive be… Full story
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Alexis Neiers’s Pretty Wild Road to Recovery
Alexis Neiers's life has been turned into a meme, a magazine article, a book, a symbol for millenial narcissism, and now a movie directed by Sophia Coppola and starring Emma Watson. But she's trying to escape all that. Full story
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The Worst Restaurant in the World
Where do all the horrible crawling things in LA congregate, make weekend plans, and compliment one another's handbags? Answer: the Jack in the Box on the corner of Sunset and Cahuenga. Full story
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I'm Hunting Down the Fat Fetishist Who Has My Stolen Laptop
He likes big ladies and lives in a maisonette. Full story
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Oxford Has Put Death Metal, Mesopotamians, and Noh Theater Together at Last
In a play entitled Ashurbanipal: 'The Last Great King of Assyria,' concerning the life of a seventh-century B.C. king, written by an Assyriologist DPhil candidate, blocked in the style of Japanese Noh theater, and scored by a quantum physicist with an original heavy metal soundtr… Full story
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Las Vegas Needs to Get Creative with Its Homeless Problem
Las Vegas is sending their homeless people away with bus tickets and bottles of Ensure, but are there more creative solutions to this chronic problem? Sure there are! For instance, how about making the homeless into tour guides? Full story
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Gay Men and Their Not-So-Cute Misogyny Problem
What’s up with all the misogyny, gay dudes? Seriously. I’m not saying you have to staple a copy of 'Feminine Mystique' to your forehead while blasting Julie Ruin, but could some of you (emphasis on SOME) not have such thinly-veiled contempt for women? Full story
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Saudi Arabia Isn't Having a Feminist Revolution
When it comes to women's rights, Saudi Arabia takes baby steps to a whole new level of infancy. (In utero steps? Spermy steps?) They just released their first ever anti-domestic-violence ad, so I guess that's something, but women are still unable to defend themselves against thos… Full story
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Don't Bet on the Apocalypse
Remember those billboards during the summer of 2011 that boldly claimed the world was going to end on May 21 of that year? Those predictions were put together by a California-based Christian cult who is now destitute, because they spent all their money thinking there'd be no need… Full story
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The Strongest Dwarf in New Jersey
When I was a toddler in New Jersey, my only playmate was the seven-year-old dwarf who lived next door. And although I don't blame him for anything, that dwarf came to physically torment me to the point of bruises and diapers full of sand. Full story
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Thought and Memory
Back in 2008, when my first novel, 'A Tree Grows in Baghdad,' came out, my publisher sent me on a West Coast tour. Sometimes folks came out in droves, sometimes they didn’t. It was great to see my public, regardless. I found I liked signing books. I must have shaken a thousand ha… Full story
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My Dead Grandparents Make My Mom Win Big in Vegas
Two years ago my mother's mother, my baubie, suddenly passed away—and ever since, my mom’s been unstoppable at gambling. I’m a staunch atheist, and yet I'm pretty sure my dead grandparents have given my mom the power to win big in Vegas. Full story
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How to Hone Your Gaydar to Perfection
These days with more and more social circles becoming sexually diverse, how can you tell if the guy swinging a glow stick next to you at some Bushwick "rave" is looking to put his pole in a hole or looking for another pole to pole all over his face? Full story
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Asking New Yorkers: "How Would You Feel if Your Mayor Smoked Crack?"
It's not totally surprising that famously erratic Toronto Mayor Rob Ford got filmed sucking a glass dick. But what would it be like if a more respected authority figure, like New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg, was found in similar cracked-out circumstances? Full story